Reader, it’s been Monday all damn day so far.
I got very short sleep last night. For a girl* who mostly has an upbeat attitude and an unclenched jaw, I still have a lot of stuff on my mind, and it tends to run away with itself as I’m trying to settle in for sleep.
*girl, yes girl, not middle-aged woman. because it’s my story and i’m holding on as long as i want.
Recently I read a thing that I wrote down because it was prophetic, and it said something like, “What were your worries three worries ago?”
I think I read this from Liz Gilbert (eat-pray-love), and I’ve actually gone and tried to recall my worries from three worries ago, and some came right to mind, but others were tough to drum up. So I’m trying to just Calm Down, as T-Swizzle sings, and remind myself that these worries will all be past worries at some point and probably won’t even amount to much of anything.
I’m mostly worried about going home this weekend, and then making the decision to bring one of mon petite chats down to Florida and letting him – or her – settle in here with me.
I worry about who to bring. Probably DJ, but I miss Purry, too, and also Toby (but he is NOT a good candidate for change); the others wouldn’t be good with change either, especially in a small temporary house, so it’s really just one of those two.
I worry that once I bring him, he’s going to feel confined in this space vs. the house.
I worry that I’ll let him out on the patio with me and #1/ the owner won’t like it and tell me non, and then he’ll never be allowed out with me and he will be sad.
I don’t want him to be sad.
I just will be happy when these worries are my worries three worries ago.
Since I had such fraught-filled sleep last night, I’m hitting the hay. And hoping that getting these darn fears out of my head and down on the computer will keep them from keeping me awake tonight.
It’s hard sometimes to be a girl who moves to Florida all by herself, Reader. But she’s learning and trying to flow with the go.
And oh, PS, in other news, I’ve been listening obsessively to T-Swifts new album and I’m in Lover with it, so there. Because I’m a young girl. Ahem.