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The Bang Bang Theories

What’s Going On

Hola, Reader-itos!  That’s my nod to Cinco de Mayo for this beautiful Saturday morning. I may or may not* be doing more nodding to the occasion later today, with tacos in my mouf and a cinco-de-margarito-drinko in my hand.

*I’m acting coy, as if there is the possibility I will be making other choices, but we both know the writing is on the taco-and-margarita wall for this evening.

So for today’s bloggie, I need to make it a quickie, and we both know that sometimes a quickie does the trick just fine. For imparting all my words to you, Reader. That’s exactly what I meant, because I’m a lady. Emphasis on the “lay.”* Ahem.

*the emphasis is mostly on the “lay” if we’re referring to my reclined position while I’m snoozing away in bed. I’m sure that’s exactly what you were thinking, amiright, Reader?

Anyway, back to the point, or else this will NOT be the promised quickie.

1. Firstly, I know you’ve been waiting with bated breath to know how my floor-orgy turned out. I’m super-happy to report that the hand job with lots of alcohol in a giant bucket did the trick!  I have a squeaky-clean and sanitized floor and it has held up all. week. long. In addition to cleaning up the mess that I made with my borax-and-vinegar-and-baking-soda-and-murphy’s-oil-soap concoction,  I’ve finally gotten rid of the all the lingering spots that seemed to reappear shortly after washing.

2. The bad news is, I am now compelled to follow through with the entire rest of the floors, and I’m not sure my old-ass-broken-down-knees-of-a-ninety-year-old are up to that task. Imma gonna try, though. At some point. Not necessarily this weekend. I need to work up to it in my mind.

3. P.S., the tea-bagging trick seemed to work, too! I only tried it on a few planks of the floor to test it out before went full-tea-bagging on the entire thing, but I also think that might be in my future. Aren’t you jealous you’re not me, Reader?? Because of all the fun I have planned? It’s fun. Fun fun fun.

4. In other news, we finally got all caught up on the tales of the Walking Dead.  We’ve been three episodes behind, and no one cares that I’ve watched t.v., but I did need to get my words out. It could end right there for me. It was a good ending, it had an ending that was acceptable, and I’m ready to move on from it. I may consider that the ending regardless if they create more episodes. So there, Writers and Producers.

5. Other media that has captured my attention lately has been making good on reading more books this year.  One of the first that I read this year was The Paris Wife, and then I got a little obsessed with Hemmingway, his wives and their lives and THEN last night I got the chance to meet the author and get a copy of her new book, and also touch and hug her and let’s just say I get super-excitable when I meet people I admire so much and my mouth runs away from me and I can’t stop gushing and I want to put her in my pocket and take her home with me and sit around drinking wine and eating cakes with her.  

6. She wasn’t up for the plan of coming home with me and eating cakes, but she did pose pretty for a picture and remembered how to spell my name when I bought another book of hers and got back in line to get the second one signed. So basically she’s probably planning on cyberstalking ME now, remembering how to spell my name so she can look me up. Except she doesn’t need to look very far to find me, because I already friend requested her months ago on Facebook and she accepted my proposal so basically we’re married.

7. It was hot in the library and my hair is super-frizzy and big.

8. I got to enjoy the evening with my cousin, who kept me in check from committing any crimes and being on a stalker list, and also it makes me happy to just be in her company for several hours at a time. She has good energy, and an even better laugh. She’s a tonic to my soul.

9. Speaking of tonic, I recently had a gin martini with ELDERFLOWER liquor thrown into the mix, and I think I’ve found my summer patio drink. It was a bouquet of deliciousness bursting in my mouth. Try one. Better yet, come over and join me on the deck and try one. As the saying goes, drinking loves company.

10. I bought a new outdoor rug for the patio yesterday, so I’m going to finish up getting that deck ready for said drinking and company.  I started cleaning up all the furniture a couple weekends ago, but then it got cold again and rained and rained and rained.  Today is the day to finish it all up.

And that, Reader, is ten things to tell you this morning. What’s new with you? Tell me something new to try (drink, book, tv show, hair-de-frizzer). And clear your calendar for a drinkie invite. No sense letting a perfectly cute patio go to waste. Also, @PaulaMcClain, you’re invited anytime. We can talk about how we’re both wide-reaching authors with a large readership.  We’re practically twinsies.  You’re just a tich taller.

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