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The Bang Bang Theories

Won’t You Come On In

Today’s Tuesday. Have some travel for work this week, and I can’t say that I’m sad about it. Kenny and I just tag-teamed Stanley’s catbutt. He held it, I cleaned it. It was a little soupy, which indicates the Ducolax is/has worked, so I think we’ll lay off that until I get back from my trips and see what’s what. It will be a relief to not have to be consumed by Stan’s butt for an evening or two. I think the ostrich has the right idea – bury that head in the sand!! The view is sometimes better.

In other news.

Lessee. Do I have other news??

Oh! New Year’s Resolves. So far I’m doing terribly.

I haven’t signed up for the online writing course I am interested in taking, because it starts this week and I’m traveling. It starts tomorrow, maybe I’ll be able to get that underway instead of *already* making excuses to postpone.

I resolved to lose 1.5 lbs per week, and so far I’m only at about 1.5 lbs, not 3. I lost, gained – it’s all just water weight, and I can’t seem to shake that off. Of course, maybe if I’d actually SHAKE some stuff around it might go somewhere else, but instead I polished off a red velvet cake roll that was stuffed with cream cheese. I should be grateful for that 1.5 lb. loss!

I also am supposed to try a Zumba tape, but it’s still sitting on the table. I tried to get acquainted with it last night but couldn’t figure out what was a DVD player on the stand of electronics (the Mister wasn’t home). I know, right? At one time I knew what it was, but somewhere along the line it’s been replaced and there are so many shiny black things there, I just have no idea. There are six things on the stand. Six. And they’re all in cahoots with each other. So I turned on some things that I thought might work, but then ended up with sound only, and no picture on the t.v. So Zumba will wait for another day.

I resolved to take my vitamins regularly. So far, Fail. I’ve taken some here & there, but not daily. Is it really that tough? The problems is (there’s always a problem, right?), that I can’t take the number of vitamins that I have lined up all at once. It’s too many, they sit in my throat and make me sick. So I have to concoct a smoothie and drop ’em in the smoothie in the morning (they open up, I just dump all the powders in). And I haven’t had enough time in the morning (another resolution I’ve failed at, getting up earlier so I have more time in the morning) to make a smoothie. Ergo, Fail.

Fail. Fail. Fail.

What have I done well? I’ve instituted Manicure Sunday at my home, to polish and file up for the week, instead of looking like a bitten & chewed up Lindsay Lohan crack-addict on my fingertips. It’s only been one Sunday and so far, Success! Someone asked me yesterday if I had gotten a manicure, but it was just me, all me.

I’ve also initiated a Soft Hands Challenge for myself. My coworker, The Hoff, has inspired me, her hands are as smooth as a baby’s bottom. Soft! Supple! Of course she’s only 32, soft hands are for the young. But I got my weaponry in place over the weekend and have been rubbing and slathering and greasing and exfoliating and I have to say that they are getting a little softer. The Hoff uses Jojoba oil every night, and occasionally will rub pure olive oil into her hands. I said of course I’ve tried that before (the olive oil), but it was just so greasy and disgusting. The key to the oil success, apparently, is rubbing it in for a really long time, and it will absorb. It works, I’ve been rubbing in jojoba oils and eventually it does, but geez – am I really going to devote this much of my life to rubbing?? Time will tell.

So that’s it. I leave you, Reader, with a really uninteresting bunch of words. That’s my life. Welcome to my world.
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