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The Bang Bang Theories

Thieves In the Night

Something is wrong with the fucking Internet connection at our house. I’ve been offline since Wednesday, and horror-of-horrors, we’ve actually had to sit and have face-to-face conversations since we can’t immerse ourselves in the innane-ness of Cyberspace. Frankly I’m sick of talking to these 2 yahoos at night (Ken & Tim) ~~ ha ha! No, seriously. Really, I’m kidding, of course I like to chat with them….my fingers say yes, my headshake says no 🙂

With the speedy response time of AT&T Tech Support, we’re supposed to have someone out here on Sunday. WTF. Sunday?? I have work to do from home that requires the Internet. I need to order Important Things. Actually, I do, some Toastmasters stuff. We have access at the moment because we tapped into an unsecured line from the dude across the street. I’m worried that I may get hacked into, but then Timmy and I figured we’re two of the smarter fuckers on the block and if we don’t know how to do it, these Parma Pollacks/Hillbillies won’t know how to do it, either. So we’re banking on the stupidity of others to keep us safe. Not so sure that’s a bad bet. Just in case, I won’t be accessing my Off Shore Bank Accounts.

A fun weekend is planned, we’re going to the Tribe game Saturday night, then joining our friendies at the Sly Fox in Great Northern. Should be an earlier night, Kenny and I have given up the hooch until Vegas. We’re on a new healthful eating/drinking approach since I’ve been obsessively watching You Are What You Eat on the BBC, and that nixes alkeehol. Not to mention red meat, sugar and an overabundance of starches. And I now view broccoli as little “brushes” sweeping through my large intestines, cleaning shit that’s been stuck in the nooks and cranny’s right out, making me spic-and-span on the inside. So that’s that. We’re sticking to this until our October 14-day indulgence vacation, with one little time-out for Vegas this coming week.

My garden is flourishing, which is no surprise considering the abundance of rain we’ve had. I’ve got many green tomatoes growing, and now wish I would have planted more. I could be canning, for Chrissake. Yeah, right 🙂 I would post pictures, but that’ll wait until my own DSL is back up & running. I fear this is a tentative connection at best.

That is about a wrap-up, logging off before I get hacked into and my identity gets stolen. Who the hell would wanna steal all this – have at it, I say! Be me! Go, get all the Greatness That Is Me and BE IT. Ha! Just moments ago Kenny and I were talking about a wedding date, and he informed me I’m not really very nice to live with overall and he’s not too inclined to join the Parade of Husbands that have marched through my life. He may be right, he may be right.

Peace, and if someone does decide to steal my life, I hope like hell they take all the clutter with them. And the unwashed laundry.

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