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The Bang Bang Theories

Tough Love

Scene: Tracye was spending a few minutes on the exercise bike before bed, limbering up her hips to ensure a restful night of sleep.

Tracye to Kenny at 10:20 p.m.: “Go make the bed, and do a good job. I want my sheets smoothed out.”

Kenny: “It’s already done, I did the best job I can do.”

Tracye, sarcastically: “I anticipate seeing what classifies as the best job you can do.”

Kenny: “It’s good, it’s nice, everything’s smooth.”

Tracye: “Well then, go pull the headboard away from the bed a little, it’s knocking against the wall (when we knock boots).

Kenny: “I don’t know how to do that.”

Tracye: “Yes you do, you fucking moron.”

A few things I’d like to note about above conversation. Firstly, that Kenny dreamily suggested going to bed at 10:20 p.m.
My, my, Mr. Fly. How times a-change when YOU have to get up for a J.O.B. in the morning.

Back in the olden days, when I suggested heading to bed at oh, say 11:00 p.m., I was answered with whines of, “So early?? Stay up and watch Seinfeld and Old Christine reruns with me.” Which I did.

I believe I’m the fucking moron. Ahem.

The second thing I’d like to note about the above conversation. When I called him a “fucking moron” there was laughter and a smile behind the words. So it’s not quite as harsh as it may read to you, Reader. In my defense. Are those love words even defensible??

Anyhoo. If they are offensible, someone needs to toughen up. Pussy. Or shall I say “Pussytwat,” which is a frequently used word I’ve stumbled upon in the latest book I’m reading, House of Holes. That book gets it’s own blogpost. Consider this your teaser.
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