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The Bang Bang Theories

Conversations with (Drunk) Kenny…

Thursday night we met some friends at a little local hangout for some Karaoke and beers. Why in the world would Kenny be interested in Karaoke Night, since his job is so immersed in it? Well, he knows the bar owner pretty well, and of course he’s addicted to the Keno, so he was in. A little sidebar here, this happens to be a bar that I used to hang out in back in the late 80’s, early 90’s, a group of us would go dancing every week. We had a reserved table, kinda like Studio 54, only with more piss on the floor and less movie stars. I also met my 2nd ex-husband here. I think there’ll be better luck with Keno (p.s., I did hit 5 of 7 numbers on a ticket last night, but it only paid a disappointing $11).

But I digress. So we went to Mr. Peabody’s Pub. We had some beverages. And sang. And carried on a bit. We were celebrating Long Jesus Weekend and 82-degree Cleveland weather. And chocolate. That’s a whole lot to celebrate!

At the end of the night, after singing rousing renditions of Neil Diamond’s Brother Love Travelling Salvation Show and a little Harper Valley PTA (oh, and of course we did a duet of Summer Nights), Kenny needed something to eat since we had enjoyed a dinner of cereal prior to going out.

I pulled into Rally’s, which was really quite busy at 1:00 a.m. Question: How many drunks do you think are in the Rally’s drive-thru at 1 a.m.?? All of ’em, would be my guess (except for me, as the designated driver).

While I wasn’t drunk, I ordered like a drunk. In my defense, I haven’t been to Rally’s in YEARS so I’m not familiar with the menu and it was dark out and I felt rushed. So a bunch of orders just spewed out of my mouth, anything I saw on the menu I seemed to blurt out. The order included healthy items such as hot dogs, chicken tenders, seasoned fries, Big Bufords, and something on sourdough bread with bacon – I don’t even know.

While waiting at the window for our late night “snack,” Kenny informed me, “I’m gonna work on my book this weekend (slur)….I want to write it my own way, in the first person, and with a lot of dot dot dots.”

It seems he’s a fan of the dot dot dots…I wasn’t aware of this prior to last night…I tried to get to the reasoning behind it, and all he could say was he likes the thoughts to trail off, so the reader can fill in their own ideas…and then he can transition to new thoughts with dot dot dots without being all concerned with the grammer and punctuation…see how that worked out right there…maybe he’s on to something…all this time in all my thoughts of writing, I’ve never really given the dot dot dots their proper due…I guess I’m going to revisit the uses for the dot dot dots…maybe that’s a pretty good idea after all!…this has been a pretty fun paragraph to type!…try it for yourself…okay, that’s all for now…fill in your own thoughts here…

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