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The Bang Bang Theories

Things I Learned

Now that I’m 43, I actually checked the expiration date on the gallon of milk before drinking a glass with my vitamins. Take that, Spoiled Milk! You can’t fool ME again! I’m OLDER & WISER now!

Now that I’m 43, I actually used the lint roller to remove the cat from my ass BEFORE I left for work. No more Disheveled Arriver in the morning. Take that, Haired-Up Pants!

Now that I’m 43, I actually have to go to bed instead of staying up late blogging. Take that, Old Lady!

More to come later, when I have time to write the Early Bird Special.

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