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The Bang Bang Theories


Sometimes it’s the seemingly insignificant things that make you realize how much your upbringing has shaped your perceptions. I like to think I’m an Independent Thinking Trixie Bang Bang, but something small will occur and I’ll have my mother’s or my grandmother’s values whispering in my ear, shaping my thinking.

This isn’t a bad thing, Reader. It’s just a thing.

A lot of the time I hear my grandmother talking about all The Waste. We waste so much.  Time. Leftovers. Money.  I hear her every time i hesitate to throw out the stuffing that has been in a container in the fridge since Thanksgiving. I cleaned the fridge today, wiping out all the leftovers, but left them sitting on the counter rather than tossing them.

My Mister went to empty the trash bag and asked what’s up with all the stuff on the counter.

Me, hesitating…well, it’s from Thanksgiving….do you think the hambone is still good to make soup??

MM: “NO!!”

Me: “Well….do you think I should toss some of it outside, for Taco the Raccoon and the deer and the birds?”

MM: “NO! You’re going to attract coyote’s, who will not find lunchmeat one day and will instead eat Gussy.”

Me: “You’re right, I know you’re right….can you throw it all out in the trash for me then?”

I couldn’t. I just. couldn’t. do. it.

My grandmother Sophie was right there in my ear, shaming me for all that waste. She would have had bean soup made the day after Thanksgiving, using up all that good hambone.

Tonight I decided to make red velvet cupcakes, because I like the process and the smell of baking, and the eating of said baking. I know I can’t just eat two dozen cupcakes, and my co-workers aren’t that receptive to baked goods, but I’ll take some to work anyway. Because I enjoy the process.

While making the batter, I heard my mother in my ear.  I used the full three eggs the directions called for, and that is indulgently wasteful and not necessary. Growing up we never made a cake with three eggs. We used two eggs only, as my mother said, “two will work just fine.”

And you know what? It did.

In fact, I’m not sure how adding that extra egg even improves the cake , but that could be because it’s been so long since I’ve only used two.

Great, and thanks, Me. I’ve just created a project where I have to have a bake-off with myself. A batch of cakes with two eggs and one using the decadent three, and then a blind taste-off.

I’m going to need tasters, Reader. Because now we have to know if that third egg really makes a difference, or if it’s just the egg company’s way to get us to consume more, those rotten egg pushers.

In an interesting twist, eggs are now so damn inexpensive from Walmart it doesn’t even make fiscal sense to scrimp on the additional egg. It’s 26cents/dozen nowadays.  You can cook willy-nilly with 26cent/dozen eggs.

But I still hear the whisper in my ear, Reader, when I’m adding that indulgent third egg.  And tossing out leftovers. And letting the milk spoil and the hambone go to waste.

Seriously, though. I think I need to do a bake-off/taste-off. I need to get to the bottom of the necessity of that third egg. Come over, Reader. Let’s test cakes. It’ll be the most fun test you’ve ever taken. Pinky swearsies.


2 thoughts on “Whisperings

  1. Well if I was in the area I would definitely be a test taster. If you wanted to use your ham bone you should have put it in the freezer, I always have good intentions also but if I don’t freeze it I throw it out. Sophie didn’t waste anything, bless her heart. As far as your Mom, Sharon could make anything and everything. I miss those days we had cookie exchange. We gossip ed about just about everyone. If only we could go back, this time of year we went shopping for our kids and laughed a lot. Love you!!

    1. Aw, thank you for the memory! I wish we could have a “go back in time at the holidays”…not to change things, just to enjoy them again with the people who are no longer with us. Love you too C-Lee!!

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