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The Bang Bang Theories

I Haven’t Got Time for the Pain

It’s Friday morning. I’m at home, waiting to see the doctor at 1:00 p.m.

I hurt my back last Friday. Er, sometime last week. It started acting up on Friday. I remember twisting it some time earlier that week, I think while I was showering and reaching around to loofah my back, and it went into an uncomfortable spasm. But then it passed, or so I thought.

I think that was the beginning of the pain.

Last night I moved to get out of bed and did something wrong. The pain is now wrapped around my back to my front, radiating down into my vagina and down the front of my leg.

I waited until 9 a.m. today to call the doctor, even though I considered going to the ER last night. But then that felt ridiculous. I’m from a family who did not go to the ER unless death was eminent. I actually laid awake in bed last night crying, thinking that compared to the Tsunami victims in Japan, this is nothing, and I need to not even consider going to the ER.

My doctor’s office advised me to go to the ER.

I told her that I didn’t believe that you were supposed to go to the ER just because something hurts, isn’t it reserved for more life & death situations? And that it feels ridiculous to go to the ER just because I’m in some pain (images of Tsunami victims played out in the scenes of my mind), although it’s enough pain to keep me unable to stop crying.

The doctor himself called me back, asked me if I could come in at 1:00. Through my tears I replied, “As long as I don’t have to look pretty, I can come in.” He paused, and then burst out laughing and told me that no one had ever had that line for him before.

I’m just hoping to be able to shower before I go see him. I fear I’m a little smelly in my areas, due to my lack of being able to twist and bend to wipe Things to my usual specifications.

I’m willing to risk a doctor’s visit weigh in to get my back to stop hurting. That’s how much it hurts.
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