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The Bang Bang Theories

Butter Runneth Through My Veins

Hello Peeps!!

Well, here we are – one more day of smooth sailin’ before we have to start packing up and heading for home. Joanne, luckily for me it won’t be too much trouble to pack up since I did not unpack 🙂 ~inside joke~ .

We just enjoyed our first dinner in the dining room, it was robster night so we ate ’em up. With prime rib. Kenny just informed me he’s got only one more meal before his pants won’t cooperate anymore.

For those of you who know my goal to eat a different gourmet cupcake every day, I was tracking on my goal perfectly until yesterday – I missed a day. I plan on heading down to the Cupcake Cupboard for TWO as soon as I’m done with you people 🙂

The ship is A. MAZE. ING. Far far far exceeded my expectations. What looked sorta cheesy online is really impressive in person. I even rode the carousel (sp? – no time for spellcheck) I hand-picked my ride, too – it was a tiger. I pretended I was Sookie Stackhouse riding a tiger around. You need to know the books to get that, but whatevs – as long as I understand my motives 🙂

We have had great weather. We did flipflop our agenda due to Hurricane Igor so we stopped in St. Maartin before St. Thomas. We had so much fun there. We took an Island tour which included a stop off at the airport where we watched the nutballs stand on the beach behind the airplanes that take off. There are giant signs that say “danger, standing there will KILL YOU” but people do it anyway. They line up on the beach and the force of the jet pressing down for takeoff is so fierce that it blows those nuts off their feet and into the water. It was something to see.

From there we went to the Nudie Beach, or “adam and eve” as the locals call it. We saw many many many Things. It was an experience in diversity for me 😉 We did not partake in the nakey-ness. We milled about fully clothed and peered at everyone through our dark sunglasses. We were only there for 20 minutes, just long enough to see some things that’ll stay burned in our memories for a long while.

Then we toured more but the highlight was on the way back to the ship. The tour guide showed us his local after-hours hangout, where all the taxi guys and whatnot get together at the end of the day and eat bbq and drink Presidente beer. I (of course, me) said, “We want to go!!” and he looped us right back in the round-about and took us over to the local place. We enjoyed many many beers and some of the best bbq on the island, I’m sure. We grooved to the music in the parking lot and they showed me how they make bbq fish on the grill. They had a whole cooler of fresh-caught that they clean and then stuff with fresh-caught crab and shrimp, and then put the whole fish back on the grill for bbq-ing. It wasn’t done so we couldn’t taste that, but we got the guides card for the next time we’re in town. That’s my 2nd island bbq I’ve managed to horn in on – the first time Joanne was with me and we were at Megans Bay in St. Thomas. I have a way about me, obviously.

St Thomas was fun, too, nothing out of the ordinary. We swam around in Megans Bay. Saw an Iguana. Got sand in all our cracks. Typical beautiful beach day. But I do think that Aruba is still the prettiest.

Our first stop at the beginning of the week was to the Bahamas. We weren’t able to get up in time to enjoy the island there, the ship left at 2 and we slept til 11 or something crazy like that. Joanne keeps me on a much tighter schedule in the morning! Kenny keeps me up late at night in the casino.

We’ve seen a handful of shows and they’ve all been good. There was a heckler at the comedy show who had to get thrown out. It was pretty great, I don’t think the cruise line ever dealt with that before so they didn’t quite know what to do. Overboard? Well, whatever happened it was fun to watch the drama go down. I enjoy that when I’m safely on the outskirts.

It’s been a really fast-feeling week – not sure where it all went. We’ve had no luck in the casino, but ya win some, lose some. Maybe tonight!

I’m only a little bit sunburned.

Mimi, I had a brazillian hair blowjob. Er. Blowout. Something brazillian on my head occured. It’s supposed to keep it smooth and straight and so far it’s feeling and looking quite foxy. In fact, last night I was trying to steer a complete drunkard to his room (pointing in the general direction) and he 1/ tried to kiss me square on the mouth and then 2/ told me, through unfocused eyes and teetering on one leg that i was a “hot biscuit.” I wonder if that’s because he could smell the melted butter that must be running through my veins…I eat a lot of butter on cruises. I like it. A lot.

Oh!! Yeah!! I WENT TO THE GYM ONE DAY!! HOORAY FOR ME!!! The running track has encouraging messages like “1 more lap and you can have dessert tonight!” My gym clothes go with me on every trip, but rarely make it out of the case.

Alrightie, have a fun Friday, landlubbers. I’ll be home all too soon.

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