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The Bang Bang Theories

Words From the Unwise.

By accident, JUST NOW, Reader, I learned what this little horseshoe shape on my toolbar means:

In all my years of writing stories here, I’ve never really been interested enough to simply HOVER over that and see what it could do.  Well, let me just tell you, it offers up a whole host of special characters like ↵ Œ ™ © Ψ  and other stuff I’ll never use, but it’s nice to just see the options.

I’ve also never changed my font color (that I can remember, Reader – maybe I have at one point, who knows), but in my lesson of discovery, that’s up there, too, so I made those special characters purple just for funzees.

This is definitely the oddest time in my lifetime, and probably yours, too, Reader.  9/11 was a very different time, too, but it was a different different.

I’m not sad or mad or anxious about being home.  I’m relieved I have a nice home that I love to be sequestered in.  I look around and have a lot of projects that need to be – and should be – being handled during this down time, yet it hasn’t been the time yet to do them, so there they are, still waiting.

And that’s okay.  I’ve given myself permission to be okay with not doing them yet. I’ll get to them, but it doesn’t have to be all in one big swoop.

Yesterday I was down the rabbit hole of sadness and anxiety and feeling bereft and as if life just didn’t matter any more. I know, so dramatic, but it was the feelings and so I crawled under the covers and cried for probably a good three hours. The kinda crying where I couldn’t breath crying, and then I was convincing myself I had Covid-19, and that’s what I get for going out to buy food, which made me cry more.  I’m fairly certain my Doom and Gloom mindset came from #1 too much News on the tv,  #2 reading American Dirt and wow, I’m now sad for all refugees and want to find a job in the future where I can help them and #3 Tiger King which was one fucked-up group of people that frankly I don’t care about, but I do care about all those animals. So I trifecta-ed myself into feeling dismayed with the world.

I’m only sharing that with you, Reader, because sometimes it’s okay to not be positive all the time. Mostly I’m a sunny-outlook person, and generally find the funny twist in life. But sometimes you can also get sucked down by all the bullshit – the hypocrisy of people, the awful and selfish and racist buffoon of a president, the virus, the financial mess, etc… and sometimes you just have to wallow in it.

But it’s not okay to get stuck there. That’s when all The Bad Things happen, and the next thing you know you’re being featured on 600-lb Life and Hoarders all at the same time. One of those problems is handle-able, but not both at the same time. We have to space out our dysfunction.

So this morning (noon….ssssh…no judging, I’m still fragile-ish) I got up and did two things I could control: A good hard-scrubbing shower, and made the bed.  And instead of signing right on to work, I took this next hour for myself and a cuppa coffee, and decided to write a smidge of words and get in my own head a little bit, but in a good way.  And the first thing I found by complete accident is that sometimes – sometimes – there’s Special Characters right in front of you and you never took the moment to notice it before, and it could offer up some interesting little things for you. Reader,

I’m certain you have Special Characters around you – things you may not have noticed or paid attention to before. It could be a thing or a people or a flitter of a birds wing right outside your window.  I’m not here to tell you what to do, Reader. Hell, I barely know what to do myself most of the time. But maybe, just because it’s a weird-o time, if you’re feeling a little overwhelmed or anxious or just want to cry, #1 go do it and #2 try to find that special character that you never noticed before and hover over it for a second and see what it offers up.


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Peep Show

Before the Pandemic broke loose, we were getting Fancy at Chez Bang Bang.

In addition to buying our fancy coffee maker, we also laid out a hunny for one of those fancy doorbells with a camera.

Mostly because we wanted to more closely monitor the comings and goings of our Outdoor Kitty who happens to live in a raccoons body, Taco.

I’m actually going to start an insta page for Taco so she can be on the ‘gram, as we are learning a lot about her likes and dislikes…

likes: short walks around the neighborhood, chocolate cake, meatball sandwiches

dislikes: potato peels, lettuce, pierogies

…and frankly we are being selfish hogging her from the world.

Also, as her parents, we really need to get her home cleaned up out there. We just bought a rake to get it under control as the weather is supposed to break this week. And since we’re going on lock-down as of midnight, we might as well do some stuff around here.

So we bought a video doorbell because I thought it would be nice if Taco could let us know when she was in the neighborhood and could ring for her breakie and dinner.  I mean, I was totally caught off guard by her the other morning and had to quickly throw a donut out to her and I’m not even sure if she got to enjoy it or if the birds got to it first. Either way, someone ate it, but I would just like to know her schedule a bit better so we can cater to the needs of the wildish racoon kitty who lives in the ravine. Because that’s normal behavior.

What I’ve discovered about myself from having a video doorbell is that I can’t stop making dirty videos when I’m out on the porch.

It all started with a simple boob-shake to – wait for it – titillate My Mister – you know, a quickie, unexpected peep show. Because I’m sure everyone does it; again, normal behavior.

But then! One night it turned into a full-on pants-down good ol’ fashioned mooning, and HandyDan nearly feel off the stoop when he realized I actually was pulling my pants down from the behind parts and giving it a little shimmy for the camera.

I blame Shakira and J Lo for their half-time show. I’m certain after that exhibition, all the fiddy-and-up ladies out there are just putting on mini peep shows for their doorbells. Right? Tell me I’m right, Reader.

The saddest part of this whole story is that #1/ My yard needs hella lotta raking and my hands are already forming blisters just thinking about it and #2/ My mini peep shows have gone mostly unnoticed and almost totally unappreciated by My Mister.

So the only course of action I can take is to keep it up, and to give it even MORE, which is exactly what I intend to do until someone screams Uncle! which will probably be our neighbors, but let’s face facts, that wouldn’t be the first time they’ve probably seen things they don’t want to see. I have convinced myself my deck is an isolated oasis and prance around their nekkid most of the summer, but only for HEALTH REASONS, Reader, because I need to maximize my Vitamin D. Sheesh. You act like that’s unusual behavior.


Hey, Sugar…

What I’m about to show you, Reader, requires a level of #1/ awe and #2/ appreciation for the skill involved to compile an arsenal of quarantine necessities the likes you can only image.

Acquired in a short time, Reader, and under situations of duress; yet I persevered, I can incorrectly and not at all like assume much like my grandmother during the Great Depression

We realized we were not prepared for Hunkering Down at Chez Bang Bang.

We had no great stocks of canned goods, frozen foods or meats.

The past year I had been using up what had been collecting over the course of time in our pantry, and as a result I was left with basically a rather large stash of canned beets as well as no less than five boxes of graham crackers, purchased when and for what I do not know.  We don’t eat graham crackers on any sort of a regular cadence. We never even ponder opening up a box of graham crackers, yet there they were, loaded into my pantry.

But as I said, the actual groceries were being used up, because money was tight for the past year, then I moved for seven months so nothing new was added, and once I came back home I was still working on the process to use up what was already paid for.

So the pandemic caught us a little short in the pantry.

And there was a need to restock.

I had no intent to Panic Shop. Panic Shopping is ridiculous, we have goods, this isn’t Russia for crying out loud, where we are going to be standing in miles long lines for our allotted loaf of bread.

But something about seeing all those bare shelves — I don’t know, it had an effect on my brain and the Hunger Games flashed through my mind and the next thing we knew, we were making all sorts of purchases that included THREE PIES because they were TWO DOLLARS each and when they’re two damn dollars, you don’t have to decide between peach or strawberry or blueberry, you BUY ONE OF EACH, OF COURSE YOU DO!

And then there were the 3/$10 ice cream because we already have the PIE in the cart, and don’t forget something chocolate, that would be shameful, and also what about BREAKFAST, so in came the donuts and the windmill cookies and all that is good and fine. Then the St Patty’s Day cookies were a DOLLAR and in the spirt of BALANCE we picked up salty evening snacks, too.

And that is how we came to have an abundance of cakes and treats because of the damn CHINESE VIRUS* so basically they are too blame when fatty fatty two-by-four can’t fit through the bathroom door.

*I could get started on that, but i won’t and instead will just use an entire population as the reason i’m fat. and diabetic. hey, if it’s good enough for the president to take zero responsibility, then it’s good enough for me. i’m going to also rate myself a ten. so there, easy. 

Except I can still fit through the door and I weighed myself this morning and actually lost a pound so jokes on all you dieters, because basically worry uses up a lot of calories and I’ll be skin and bones by May if this keeps up.

I’d invite you over but you know, keep yer filthy germs to yourself, Reader.


Como Estas?

You. Guys.

EVERYTHING in the world is happening right now, and I’ve decided that it is my social distancing responsibility to write nonsense valuable information on a much more regular – if not daily – basis.

I add the “if not daily” because does that mean I won’t be posting daily, or I will? I think that’s a statement that can go either way so whatever happens, I can count that as a success and that’s how I like my goals.

I’m also going to have much more free time in the coming weeks because my work hours were slashed in half, and I’m only complaining a little bit not complaining because other folks lost all their hours including My Mister, so our house is on financial lockdown.

Except for that ten dollar bottle of wine I purchased and drank all up last night, because read long-winded sentence above.

Instead of being a big ball of All The Time Fret, though, Imma just going to write some stories, clean up Chez Bang Bang, and apply for full-time jobs that we both know won’t be doing any interviewing so it’s basically fruitless, but I like fruit and that doesn’t even make sense, but maybe I’m still drunk from that bottle of wine, which is made with fruit, so full circle right here.

Most of the time when I sit down here I don’t even know what is going to fly off my fingertips. This is one of those times.

I did spend part of the day yesterday trying to convince My Mister that if we can convince 100 of our friends to send us $100, and then WE send $100 to someone we can get a chain reaction going and also have $10,000, and doesn’t that sound simple enough?

He didn’t believe in the plan.

He felt there was a hitch in it somewhere, and basically said our friends wouldn’t be reliable enough and I feel like he threw down a challenge to you guys and you should PROVE HIM WRONG and get those checks addressed to Chez Bang Bang post haste and he will then have cage-free egg on his face.

In other happenings, I have had a can’t-lose book idea for years now, and it was just this morning that it all came together for me and now I have to write it.  Nothing like a pandemic and self-imposed house arrest to inspire me.

Also, I’ve been on a 29-day streak of practicing up my Espanol, and having that app keep count  of my days for me has really brought to light how time passes whether you’re doing something or not. My yoga has been consistently irregular, too, which means that I do it at least three times a week, but sometimes more, although I stopped checking off my little boxes so I don’t have that visual reminder. I can’t say I’m any more bendy, but I’m also not less bendy, so I’ll take that as a win. I did have to contort way over today to get something that fell behind my nightstand and it was almost easy so maybe something is happening.

This week’s New Thing I’m Adding includes intermittent pushups and sit-ups to my daily schedule. I just do standing push-ups against my countertop – whenever I pass by I give it fifteen – and holy shitz are my arms sore and also my boobs, so there. It’s hard being an athlete.

So basically what we’ve learned here is:

1/ Sometimes stressful shit just happens and we can’t do anything about it

2/ If you practice one little thing every day, maybe you’ll get a little bit better at it, but you probably won’t get worse and time is going to pass more quickly than you can even realize anyway


5/ If all else fails, drink wine, because it’s a fruit and fruit is good for you.

You’ll notice that we skip from 2 to 5 in those bullets, and that’s because I had two other points, but they were so far from worth even including I took them out and decided not to renumber. Sometimes you just have to delete and move on.



Revved Up

Hi there, Reader (she types exuberantly, safely from a distance and with very clean hands)!

We just haven’t even gotten together much recently, and there are so. many. unimportant things. I need to tell you! I know, you can hardly wait!

What a wacky times we’re livin’ in, amiright? I was at the grocery the other night for cat food – I panicked, thinking hoarders were going to swoop it all up and my three cats would be left with nothing to eat except my eyeballs – so I hightailed it over there and I mean, come’on people.

Shelves were bare.

It was 10:30 at night and the lines were still long. Self checkouts were closed, not that I participate in those anyway, because they irritate me – the store hires less employees to make you “work” for them for free, and you don’t even get a discount for acting as a store employee. Whoever dreamed that up and convinced people to work for free while taking away jobs for someone else is an absolute genius and also a monster.

But anyway, enough on that soapbox, because there are so many others right now I could be climbing atop, but we’re here to discuss why I don’t want my cats to eat my eyeballs or something.

On one final grocery store note, my brother took this photo last night at some store he popped into:

Directly after this post, I have to brave the store myself and pick up a few things as I’m having a Girl Extravaganza at Chez Bang Bang tonight, because I thumb my nose at global pandemics.  And also it’s just a handful of girls who I’m fairly certain are good hand-washers, so it’s not as risky as it sounds. Last month I decided to start a Cocktail & Crafts monthly get-together, because it’s fun to do both of those things, and so tonight is the night. I had a whole plan with a signature cocktail to go along with, but I’m not sure what that will be tonight – maybe piña coladas, but that might be too much work to pull together.  We will see how much gumption I have in an hour or two.

You know what is helping with all my gumption lately?


Because I treated myself – for the first time in a good long while – to a Luxury Purchase.

The other night I turned on the telly and for some odd reason it started right up on QVC – which I never watch, so clearly it was a sign from God – and it was touting a Nespresso machine and all the Holy Caffeine Goodness it can create. I had researched these several years ago but refrained from the purchase, so it’s not as impulsy as it may sound.

I watched the infomercial for a while and then yelled to My Mister, “Hey! Bring me my wallet!”

MM: “What is going on in there?”

Me: “We’re going to get this thing tonight.”

He momentarily tried to talk me out of it by saying, “That’s not a great deal, you can find a better deal online,” And then I challenged his naysayer ass to do just that and he couldn’t deliver.

So it was purchased and we are in love. Not necessarily with each other, but each of us is in love with our caffeine with frothy foam creator.

I had a friend who once said she wouldn’t compromise on the quality of her coffee in the morning, because, “What if that turns out to have been the best part of my day?”

So that.

I may have to change Crafts & Cocktails to Crafts & Coffee and do a brunch theme next month because great things should be shared.

Also, you would think that all this extra pump of caffeine would make me extra productive, but frankly I haven’t noticed a big spike in energy, although I was cleaning my kitchen table legs with a toothbrush and pushing my porn couch around the living room to clean and scrub underneath it, so maybe I’m in denial.

And also, probably why I don’t fall asleep until 2 a.m. Risk vs. Reward, Reader. Risk vs. Reward.

Marching On

Hiya, Reader!

We are sitting here on the first day of the third month of the new year so it’s a good time to reflect on what we’ve accomplished to date. Let’s consider this our corporate touchbase to see how we’re tracking towards our goals. Only in this case, I’m reviewing myself and you get to just sit there and drink wine, which frankly is how all corporate reviews would go if I were in charge of the world, and then I’d give me a big juicy raise for every single attempt on a good goal.

GOAL A) I’ve been working regularly-ish on my yoga goals. I say “ish” because while I have no set number, I strive for a minimum of 3x a week, and this week is looking like it’s going to be the minimum and that’s counting on me getting straight up from here and getting at it.

It’s been a different and busy week. Our friend had his hip replaced on Monday, and we finally convinced him that the best place to get tended to was at Chez Bang Bang, because

#1/ we have a wide house with handrails already decoratively built in by the people who built the house and

#2/ I’ve been on the receiving end of medical care and understand the importance of the little “extras” that make you just a tich more comfy.

With that photo, I also see  how I need to go and clean the bathroom door, everything is a project around here.

Just last night I was scooching along giving my hallway floors a handjob because every time I mop, it looks like a streaky, filthy mess.

I spent precious time reading up on why this is occurring, and the conclusion is that it could possibly be because I switched to using vinegar and water only to clean the floors – coupled with hot water, which somehow makes it worse instead of extra-disinfecty as I had thought it would be – and it seems that all the “shine” is stripped after a year of that and now it’s just basically a fucking nightmare mess.

The solution offered involved washing with only distilled water and a very damp cloth, wiping it with a dry cloth as you go, which is what I did at midnight last night – with regular water though, as I do not happen to have a jug of distilled water at the ready – just to see if it works and that’s how I rock out with my cloth out at midnight on a Saturday night around here, Reader, so eat your hearts out with jealousy.

And that’s why I’m only at the minimum with my yoga so stop judging me, Reader.

GOAL B) Practice up on my language skillz.  That has been easy peasy and I’m rocking on my 13-day streak and just finished it up one second ago to ensure I didn’t miss it today. I learned disculpe. No, I’m not going to tell you. Because I’m a meanie wah-heenie.

GOAL C) Get my biz idea relaunched. I did start that last weekend, getting a website sort of looked into and pre-built but then I got sidetracked and think I’m going in the wrong direction and just need to learn how to build it in Wix and DO IT.  Technology can impede my progress when I don’t know how to do something and can’t afford to pay someone to do it. But imma gonna figure it out this month – it is my March goal, to March forward and get it done already.

I guess I’m really super aware of how the days turn into weeks and fly by, I think especially so because I’m checking off the days on my yoga chart and it was clearly written that this was Week 6 already.  So I guess I keep thinking I can start something and just work on it every day / week, and have something at the end of that time, or I can continue to just think about it and get nothing done and the same time is going to pass anyway.

And that’s where we’re at right now, Reader. Moving forward a teensy bit at a time.

Living on the Edge

So like a very compelling 1980’s Aaron Spelling tv show, I’ve left you with a cliffhanger:

Will Julie and Gopher find love on the Love Boat?

Will Donna give up her virginity?

What will happen to Blair and Tootie?

My $1 hair color had just as edge-of-your-seat nail-bitting outcome expectations. For both of us, Reader.

So here it is, after the wash out and dry, and I can hear your gasps of awe and amazement from all the way over here.

Yep. Trixie Bang Bang rocks the hell out of $1 hair color.

Now, to be clear, I only did around the hairline and the roots in the front, just the parts you mostly see.

The rest of the color is from various salons and the nice Florida sun.

You’re  not going to get highlighted parts from $1 hair color.

After seeing the moderate success of the $1 color, I decided to just go all helter-skelter and cut my own bangs, because as you may have noticed they are l-o-n-g, long.

So I chopped those up a little bit, too, Reader, and now I’m officially a beautician so make your appointments before all my open slots fill up.


Ahem. I mean, before all my appointment spaces are booked.


Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is

Some values have been established over at Chez Bang Bang, Reader, and it came as a bit of a surprise even to myself.

So you may or may not care know this about Trixie Bang Bang, but she has spent the last year being somewhat frugal-ish. I mean, not like Sophie* Frugal, but frugal-ish.

*Sophie is Trixie’s grandmama, and she wears the crown as the Queen of Frugal. She wouldn’t buy herself even a piece of pastry from the store unless it was 85 days old and cost no more than a quarter, and for that quarter you’d better be getting a bag of those confections, not just a measly single serving.  Sophie actually convinced me to give ’em a try one time, too, because, as she said, “you just heat ’em up in the microwave for a few seconds and they’re good as new with a cuppa coffee!” Reader, that was a lie. They were not as good as new, unless maybe they tasted like flavorless tough doughballs even when they were new.

So that’s why I say I’ve spent the last year being frugal-ish.  I will still enjoy a freshly baked pastry, because comeon.  However. I have also become quite familiar with shopping at the Dollar Tree, and have been quite impressed with some of their selections, mostly in their toothbrush area (a 2-pack of Colgate toothbrushes for $1!!) and cleaning supplies (the same bleach that costs $3 at Walmart for one whole dollar here!). What I’m saying is, I’ve gotten more savvy with my limited dollars.

Some things aren’t a hit, or even a good deal. But I will say I’ve been intrigued while walking through the personal care aisle and I’ve noticed the hair color. I mean, it’s $1.

On the other hand, it’s $1.

How in the holy-mother-of-hair is this even possibly going to work respectably?

So last night I bought one because I had some very shiny and shimmery silver roots peeking through and those bitches need to be covered, because frankly they are rude for trying to outshine me.

And that’s how it’s happened that this $1 hair color is sitting on my head right at this very moment, for another ten minutes.

And so far I’m not feeling any burning or tingling or noticing any clumps of my tresses falling to the floor.

I had fully expected to get this home and find it was a small sample size of color, but no, it was not.

It was a regular portion size, the same as every other $8 box mix.

The biggest diff I noticed was #1/ it didn’t come with an after-color conditioner (who cares!) and #2/ the gloves where a flimsier material (absolutely no one cares for a $7-$10 price savings).

This morning this conversation happened between me and My Mister:

TBB: “You’re going to be super excited when you see your coffee choices this morning!”

MM: “Did you buy k-cups at the Dollar Tree???!!”

TBB: “Don’t be ridiculous! I would NEVER trust my coffee to come from the Dollar Tree!”

And that, Reader, is exactly when I learned my values of the dollar.


Remember that time two weeks ago when I got all high and preachy and said I was going to start a 12-week yoga plan and also go on keto and basically change my entire life in one fell swoop?

Most of that didn’t happen.

Keto is just hard, ya’ll.  Yes, it made me go southern, I guess because basically I love biscuits more than I love being skinny, is the bottom line.

I think I lasted three days, and probably not all in a row, because I LOVE PINEAPPLE AND I’LL BE DAMNED IF I GIVE IT UP, KETO!

Yes, I got all shouty just now. I apologize. ~straightens skirt, clears throat~

LOL, I made myself laugh that I straightened my skirt, because we both know, Reader, I’m sitting around in my pajamas per always.

Anyway. That Keto Thing. I can see how some changes along those lines are beneficial, as in less breads and cakes and such. So I’m making some of those decisions and just saying no. But I’m saying yes to a normal amount of fruits and whatever dang vegetables seem like a good decision, because I don’t want scurvy, so there, Keto.

I know there are a good handful of you out there who say yes to the Keto, and thinks it’s easy, and you’re a stronger will than me and maybe you’re also vampires or superheros, Reader, because I like sweet potatoes and popcorn and don’t want to quit them.

So that was that.

But! On the flip side of that health coin, I’ve been sticking to my little yoga routine. And while those moves may look simple, let me assure you they are fierce. At least on this stiff ol’ body.

It has been a bit of a ….. the word?? I don’t have the word…but it’s well, it’s a struggle to fight against my inherent laziness who would rather just lay about and watch the tv.

But I’ve been fighting the lazy pull to quit and getting up and doing it instead, and I’m happy to say that while I’ve completed 10 days, I am not to the point where I’m suddenly a Nimble Nelly, but I think I may have found some grace.

Not grace in any of my moves; those are all herky jerky and I literally have to muscle myself into them and still use a bed post to help myself balance.

But I’ve found grace in not motherfucking myself while doing the moves.

My internal dialogue was really mean to me.  It was all cussy and disappointed in every single thing I am not able to do, which is mostly all of it except lying on the floor.

Yesterday I found myself saying nice things to my non-bendy knees, when they were doing the best then can. And my entire right side that is sort of froze up on reaching for the sky.  My neck that doesn’t bend easily to the left.

But nice words started talking to me, all out of the blue.  “We’ll get there – we will.  Imagine us one year from now if we just stay steady.” And I literally had no conscious thought to tell myself gentler things. It just happened, and I felt lifted and at ease with myself and I have to say, that feeling carried over all in to today.

Tonight when I did my routine I never once even thought of saying mean things to me.  It was calm and just at ease with doing what I could do.

Maybe that won’t keep up.

Maybe it will.

I just know that today, right now, I’m really liking what we’re doing for me.

It Seems More Fun on Paper

I know I told you this wouldn’t become some high road diet blog, wherein I become An Influencer and talk talk talk-ety talk about my new fantabulous lifestyle, yet here we are.

Day 2.

I’ve been super really almost-can’t-stand-it wanting something sweet in my yaw*.  I’m eating a scrambled egg with fresh mushrooms right now because I sort of skipped dinner, so now this is officially dinner.

*until right now I thought “yaw” was a fun slang word for ‘mouth’ but it doesn’t seem to be, except I think it should be, so I’m committing to it. 

I asked Almighty Google what is a more healthful substitute for sugary goodness that is also low carbs because carbs are my sworn enemy right now, and this is what Almighty Google delivered:

And all I can say is No, Google, I do not think that broccoli is an adequate CAKE substitute. Not if it were deep-fried and covered in chocolate sauce. Vile weed.

I’m almost offended on behalf of cake.

In other news of today, I decided that right now was when I was beginning a 12-week yoga challenge, let’s be clear, it is the simplest, most basic stretchy stuff that anyone should be able to do.

And yet.

I found it quite difficult.

I went through the round of poses, but again, let me be clear: I’m CERTAIN none of my positions looked like these positions. That #7?? Really? I mean. Come on. I had to pull over a chair to balance myself a little and then bend backwards WHILE HOLDING ON THE CHAIR – not my feet behind me.

I made myself a little graph and colored in my day and that is what I shall do every. single. day. for twelve damn weeks, no excuses unless something tragic happens to my body in the meantime, because this little routine can be done anywhere, as long as there’s a chair nearby.

It will be interesting to see if I in fact get more bendy along the way, or if it’s just all too late.

And that’s where we are tonight, Reader. Skeptically optimistic.


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